February 15th 2009 10.39 pm

i just sneezed on my keyboard....
i should probably go and get my awesome keyboard disinfectant swabs that i purchased for my work computer specifically to remove an old and crusty cheeto out from under my insert key (which by the way did NOT work).... but that is a whole different post i think....

so..

i actually made some notes about what i wanted to write about but now that feels really lame and so i'm not going to look at it and see if i can just write something.

actually i am having a huge HUGE concentration problem tonight, so this post might take me a freaking long ass time...

so you know how in life sometimes you feel totally light and like nothing is going wrong and everything is cool, and then other times its like what the efffffing hell??!!??!?!?!?! Why is everything messing up at the same time?????? well actually, is it really that everything is messing up at the same time, or does it just seems like that because when you are feeling so frusteratedly crappy, you just "FEEL" like everything is messed up?? well whatever.... so im in that rotation of efffffffffffff ..... but i mean i feel like im rotating past the center of effffffffff (aka Mooooooooothaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa efffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff @#$^$%&$&*&%(*^%@$##^%&%&@#$% !) and moving towards the outter rings and toward .... ummm... humm.. would effffffffff be like a season if this is a roational thing?? if so .. i guess the outer ring past Effffffffff is spring?? soooo basically im kinda in that weird weather seasonal time between melting snow and leaves sprouting on trees... you know when like..... sometimes flowers start growing and all the sudden you're snowed into your house and can't get to work on time?? yah....... its like that...

shit i just forgot that i have an appointment after work tomorrow....
i just almost deleted that because i wondered if it would have been better to write "shit i just remembered that i have an appointment after work tomorrow" instead of "i just forgot" . Then i thought that it would not really matter at all if i changed it or not. So ... I kept it.

I have a feeling that tomorrow is going to be a "snowed in" type of day, and it is making me really really nervous... i wonder if it is true that your mood attracts things or unattracts other things.... and i wonder if you really really have to believe it... like if i know that tomorrow is gonna be a shitty ass day and i really really try hard to pretend that it isn't true.... will that work?? or does this only work if you actually believe that you can by force of .. what would you call that... laws of attraction?? Would this only work if you whole heartedly believed in the law of attraction?? i dont know what i believe in .. but i really really really want to believe in the laws of attraction :]


and it really bothers me that i only wrote really three times.. this is a freaking weird thing about me .. but i feel like one of those "really"s doesn't have a match because of the fact i only wrote three.. and it makes me sad for that left out really...

so
................. really ......................

i am a freak

xo